Hell's Battlefield
by Envioussnake
Summary: *Spoilers from volume 15 of manga and Ishbal War of Extermination* Nothing could have prepared them for the living nightmare they had willingly walked into; now they wanted nothing more than to take it all back. Royai.
1. Reunion

**Title: Hell's Battlefield**

**Pairings/Characters: Royai**

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**Summary: *Spoilers from volume 15 of manga* Nothing could have prepared them for the living nightmare they had willingly walked into; now they wanted nothing more than to take it all back. Royai.**

**A/N: This is a companion piece to Pictures of the Past. The events that transpired in the previous story may be referenced; however, it is not necessary to read Pictures of the Past to understand Hell's Battlefield.**

**I will be referencing volume 15 of the manga for some of the dialogue; however, I will be typing the words from memory rather than directly from the text.**

**Chapter One: Reunion**

No amount of military training could have prepared Riza Hawkeye for the hell she had been thrown into. No one told her she would be crouching in an abandoned tower, practically swimming in her own sweat as she gazed at the faces of terrified women and children through the scope of her rifle before pulling the trigger. Nothing she told herself could block out the anguished cries of mothers and fathers, of sons and daughters, of brothers and sisters as they watched the lives of the ones they loved bleed out into the sand at their feet; nothing scared her more than the knowledge that, in a fraction of a moment, their suffering would also end, all while she exerted only as much energy as it took to move her right index finger back against the trigger of her rifle.

Riza allowed herself to take a deep breath when she saw her commanding officer give the all-clear from the ground below. Her shift wasn't over for quite some time, but she gave herself a moment to sit back off her knees and stretch her muscles. A sharp prickling sensation flooded her left leg, and she stretched it out as blood began to flow back into her sleeping limb. Each and every one of these actions was a sign that she was alive – a blessing in this living nightmare. She removed the white cloak from around her shoulders and stripped down to her brown military-issue turtleneck, savoring the burst of air that just barely brushed against her body as it streamed in through the window; even the wind in Ishbal was hot, but it was still slightly cooler than her body temperature. After wiping the sweat from her brow with the sleeve of her discarded blue jacket, she picked up her rifle and took her position by the window once more.

When sniping, time was an illusion. The only indication that time was passing at all was the sun's position in the sky, which continued its steady westward descent. It was strange how her world could be so still while the rest of the universe continued to move. If she killed someone, only those directly affected by her actions would even know a life had ended. She wondered briefly if this was the way alchemists saw the world – it would certainly explain some of her father's absurd behavior.

A sudden movement out of the peripheral scope of her rifle jolted Riza from her thoughts. Almost robotically, she aimed her gun and pulled the trigger, watching with jaded indifference was the Ishbalan fell to the ground. Something in his hand glinted in the sunlight – a knife, she presumed – and she felt marginally less remorseful about ending the life of this particular individual. She found that killing was easier if she assumed each of her targets harbored malicious intent (which was admittedly harder to do when her target was a child). Another movement caught her eye, and she moved her rifle a fraction of an inch to the right, poised to pull the trigger.

Her heart stopped as the figure lifted his gaze to her tower, his black eyes angled so that they seemed to be staring directly into her own. For the first time since her arrival in Ishbal, her hands began to shake, and she was incapable of holding her gun steady. With that one look, she was flooded with an unrelenting wave of shame – everything she had done over the past several months rushed back to the forefront of her memory. She felt as though she had been placed on trial with her sins laid bare, all because Roy Mustang had happened to look at her through the scope of her rifle, and he didn't even know it. She was ashamed of the person she had become, and, though she knew he hadn't actually seen her, she couldn't bear the thought of him knowing the things she had done on this battlefield. The thought that he had done the same, if not worse, did nothing to lighten the remorse she felt at the present moment. Abandoning her post, she sat down upon the rubble-covered floor and rested her back against the wall, burying her face in her hands.

-x-x-x-

After being relieved of duty hours later, Riza was thankful to finally be able to leave the tower. Her body ached from resting too long in a single position, and nothing sounded better than a warm meal before heading off to the makeshift showers and trying to remove some of the sand that was constantly caked onto her skin. However, it seemed as though things simply refused to go her way. As she took a cup of soup from a fellow soldier, she heard a familiar voice shout from behind her.

"Hey!"

Riza turned her head towards the cry, thankful that her face was covered by the hood of her cloak when she saw Maes approaching her. The green-eyed man had yet to recognize her, but she couldn't blame him; the last time she saw him, she had been a child visiting Central and wearing a dress back when her hair was long. Five years was a long time, and she probably wouldn't have recognized Maes, either, if she hadn't heard several people use his name.

"You were the one who fired that shot, right? Thanks for that." Maes said, walking towards her with a grin upon his lips.

Riza was planning on giving him a nod and dismissing his thanks entirely – she didn't deserve gratitude for killing another human being. However, she stopped short when she saw Roy standing behind him. She briefly battled between the instinct to flee and the desire to openly embrace him before settling on a strange combination of the two. Setting her bowl down, she lifted herself to her feet and turned her body to face the two men. An eerie sense of calmness came over her as she lifted her hands to her hood and pulled it back from her face.

"It's good to see you again, Mr. Mustang – or perhaps it's Major now." Riza stated hollowly, turning her tired hazel gaze to the man before her. She braced herself before asking the question she wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer to. "Do you remember me?"

A look of pain and disbelief crossed Roy's face as he looked down at her, and it took him a moment to speak. "How could I forget?"

Maes looked between the two of them, deciding that it was probably best to make himself scarce. He recognized Riza now, but he knew any reunion he might have with her was far less important than any she would have with Roy. He stuck his hands into his pockets, taking a step back from the two of them. "I'll see you at dinner, Roy." Not certain his friend had even heard him, Maes turned his back on the two and headed off into the lines of tents that made up their camp. Once he was out of earshot, a slight smirk crossed his lips, and he let out a slight chuckle.

Roy's gaze never left Riza's face. After a period of silence, he decided to take the initiative and be the one to speak first. "Take a walk with me?" He asked, uncertain if she would agree. Seeing her again left a nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach, and he felt like the nervous teenager who had walked up the snowy path to the Hawkeye household on that first night.

"Sure." Riza complied, just as nervous as he was. They hadn't talked to one another since she left for the military academy. She had never told him she enlisted, but there was no hiding that fact from him now. As they walked, she remained just a step in front of him, but he made no move to close the distance. The pair walked in silence away from the military camp, heading off into the desert so they could speak in private. She finally cane to a stop beside a misplaced pile of rubble and took a seat upon one of the larger stones. Roy chose to remain standing beside her, and silence fell between them once more.

Riza lowered her gaze to her hands, and she sighed before beginning to speak. "I was afraid of my father. When he lost himself in his research, he looked like a man possessed. But I still believed him. I believed that his power could be used for the greater good." She paused, studying the newly-formed scars and calluses on her fingers and palms. "That's what I used to believe. I honestly thought that alchemy could make dreams come true and that the military was working for the benefit of Amestris." She blinked once before turning her eyes up to Roy's face. "Tell me, Major. Why are we killing people? Why are we doing this when it's our job to protect the people we're fighting against? Why is alchemy being used to murder when it's supposed to help people?"

Her eyes searched his face for an answer, but he was at as much of a loss as she was. The look in his onyx eyes was one full of pain and sorrow, and he remained silent due to the lack of reassuring words he could give her. They had both been so young and idealistic, but they had been thrown into the real world with no regard as to their personal beliefs and dreams. They had been beaten down and made to do what they once would have deemed unthinkable, and it had changed them more than they knew.

Seeing that he had no answer for her, Riza turned her gaze away from him, looking off into the distance. "How could we have fallen so low?"

Roy stuck his hands in his pockets, lifting his onyx eyes to the cloudless horizon. "We tried to fly too high."

**A/N: And so it begins! I already have ideas for the next several chapters, and this story will be similar to Pictures of the Past in its ratio of somberness to light-hearted moments. I'm excited to be able to bring in a new cast of characters (keep your eyes out for Knox, Kimblee, and more!) as well as expanding upon Roy, Riza, and Maes' characters. Things are going to get very interesting on the Ishbalan war front.**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Two: What We Signed Up For**


	2. What We Signed Up For

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: I know this one came out soon after the last chapter, but it is a bit of a trade-off this time around. I am going out of town next week and would be unable to post (as I will probably not have wifi). I'm giving you this chapter early, but there probably won't be one up next weekend (unless I somehow find the time to sit down and write while on vacation). **

**I referenced Volume Fifteen of the manga for this dialogue, but the same standard goes for this chapter as the previous one.** **I typed the words from memory rather than directly from the text.**

**Chapter Two: What We Signed Up For**

Before she found Roy on the battlefield, Riza never really conversed with her fellow soldiers. She was still in the academy, which placed her at the bottom of the totem pole – not to mention the fact that she was a woman. There was no denying the fact that she faced discrimination due to her sex, but she managed to avoid a good deal of confrontation by remaining silent and fading into the background. She was able to fend off much of the physical abuse other women soldiers suffered by simply wielding her rifle at all times (there wasn't a man in her squadron who doubted she would shoot if they laid a hand on her), but the mental attacks she sometimes suffered were a different story. As a woman, she was viewed as the weaker sex, both in a physical and psychological sense, and there always seemed to be one man who felt he could taunt or belittle her without repercussion.

Due to the fact that she began spending the majority of her time off the battlefield with Roy and Maes, much of this abuse dwindled. Roy, as a State Alchemist with the rank of Major, and Maes, with the rank of Sergeant, kept the lower-ranking officers in line with threats and moderate abuse of their power. Granted, their undisguised shows of favoritism gave way to a series of less-than-favorable rumors, of which Riza was able to pick up a few whispers. It seemed that, no matter what, she was doomed to suffer one form of abuse or another, and she decided that the subtlety of rumors was the lesser of the two evils when compared to outright verbal abuse.

On one particular afternoon, the three of them were sitting around a fire as lunch was prepared by a low-ranking soldier. Several men from their regiments had joined them, and the topic on everyone's mind was the morality of their actions. The gaze of one soldier – one of Maes' subordinates, if she wasn't mistaken – dropped to the cup in his hand as he voiced the question most of them were too afraid to ask.

"Why are we doing this?"

"Why?" A cold voice repeated in an almost mocking tone. "Because that's the duty of a soldier – of a State Alchemist. Why do we kill people we're supposed to protect? Because those are the orders we were given." The man's lips curled upwards into a cruel smirk as his slanted eyes took in the faces of everyone taking part in their circle. "Isn't that right?"

Riza didn't know who had invited Major Solf J. Kimblee into their group, but she had done her best to ignore his presence up until now. Ever since Kimblee had arrived, he had been giving her strange looks, and she found it rather unnerving. So far, keeping her head down had been an effective strategy, and she continued to do just that as silence fell over the group.

It didn't last long, however; Roy's annoyed voice pierced the quiet. "So you're just going to try and rationalize all of this away?" His contempt was clear in his words and body language.

"Can't you just look at this as a job?" Kimblee retorted with a roll of his eyes. "Any of you?" Again, he received no response. His gaze passed over the faces of everyone in the group. "Well, then, how about…" His eyes fixed upon Riza. "You there, little lady. You don't like your job, do you? It's written all over your face."

Riza resisted the urge to flinch, her eyes lifting to Kimblee's smirking face. "That's true." She admitted quietly. "I don't like killing people."

"Really?" Kimblee's eyes met hers, and she was pinned to the spot by his gaze in a moment of oppressive silence. His smirk widened as he spoke again. "Tell me, Miss Marksman – in that moment after you pull the trigger, don't you feel just the slightest tinge of satisfaction as you watch your target hit the ground? Don't you take the slightest bit of pride in your skill?"

Kimblee was right – he couldn't have been more correct. Riza's eyes widened in horror as she realized how much of a monster she actually was. How sick could she be? To think that she truly _did _take pride in that brief moment when her bullet made contact with its mark! Her shoulders began to shake, and she couldn't stop, no matter how hard she tried.

"That's enough, Kimblee!"

Roy had leaped up from his seat and rushed at the other alchemist, grabbing him roughly by the collar of his shirt. Kimblee looked up at him, a challenging glint in his eyes; he was practically daring Roy to hit him.

"From my experience, your group is much harder to understand. You're always looking for ways to rationalize your part on the battlefield." Kimblee narrowed his eyes at Roy. "Is it _evil_ to kill with alchemy? Is it better to kill using a gun? Or maybe you were prepared to kill just one or two people, but not thousands?" He lifted his right index finger, pointing accusingly at Roy. "From the moment you put on that uniform, you knew something like this could happen. If you had a problem with that, why did you put it on in the first place? You act like you're the victims, but you chose this path of your own accord. You signed up for this. If you want to pity yourselves, you shouldn't have killed anyone in the first place!"

Kimblee leaned in close to Roy, placing his mouth directly beside the other man's ear. "Don't turn your eyes away from death. Look straight ahead. Stare right into the faces of the people you're killing. And don't forget them – never forget them – because I can guarantee that they're never going to forget you."

Suddenly, a loud clanging sound came over the loudspeakers wired to the sides of abandoned Ishbalan buildings. Kimblee smirked, moving away from Roy and prying the other alchemist's fingers from around his collar. "Oh, it's time. I'd better be going." He stood, looking around at the faces he had rendered stricken with horror at their own actions. With a stifled chuckle, he turned and left the group.

Riza sat motionless as the other soldiers began to stand, shaking themselves out of the morbid place in their minds Kimblee had sent them all to. It was time to get to work, and they were perfectly aware that they had a duty to perform. However, Riza couldn't quite snap herself out of her horrified state – Kimbee's accusations had been directed at her from the beginning, after all. She now knew exactly what his piercing gaze had meant: the entire time he had been near her, he had been evaluating her, searching out her strengths and weaknesses. He knew just how to get beneath her skin and stab her where it hurt the most. Most of all, he had isolated her as an easy target.

Upon feeling a hand on her shoulder, she jumped, jolting back to reality. Her eyes lifted to Roy's face, seeing undisguised concern in his onyx eyes. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, no, I'm fine." Riza assured him, though her voice wasn't very convincing. She offered him a slight smile, but even that didn't help her case. Relinquishing the attempt, she sighed, reaching out to grab her rifle before standing up. "Come on, we have to report for duty."

Roy looked down at her with a worried expression, wanting to do nothing more than comfort her (and perhaps give his fellow State Alchemist a couple of third-degree burns for his carefully constructed verbal attack on Riza). Nonetheless, they were expected to arrive at their posts, and they couldn't keep their superior officers waiting. The two of them headed off after their comrades, perfectly aware that they were about to stain their hands with blood, guilty and innocent alike. This was what they had signed up for, and they had to follow orders.

**A/N: Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Three: Collateral Damage**


	3. Collateral Damage

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**WARNING: There's a good bit of swearing in this chapter. If you read it, you'll find out why.**

**A/N: Angry Roy is fun to write :) (God, I'm a sick person XD)**

**Chapter Three: Collateral Damage**

Their mission was to eliminate as much of the Ishbalan threat as possible before the foot soldiers made their advance into the city. Destruction was encouraged and genocide was a necessity. They were to take as many lives as possible to reduce the threat – at least, those were the orders they were given. An elite squadron had been assembled precisely for this purpose: Roy Mustang – the Flame Alchemist, Solf J. Kimblee – the Crimson Alchemist, Riza Hawkeye – the Academy's best sharpshooter, and two other men Roy vaguely remembered from his days in the Academy. No one was to be left alive. While this alone placed an unsettling feeling in the pit of Roy's stomach, he still couldn't get rid of the memory of Kimblee's sadistic smile upon receiving their orders. He had known for a long time that the other alchemist was a sick man, but this solidified his suspicion.

His mind didn't have cause to linger on such trivialities as he snapped his fingers, sending a stream of fire through an open window of one of the homes. The occupants didn't even have time to scream before the flames expanded, engulfing the interior in a fiery explosion. Roy crinkled his nose at the familiar, rancid smell that streamed towards his nostrils; the burning fat left a sticky residue upon his upper lip as the bodies inside were reduced to charcoal. After hours of listening to gunfire and anguished cries, Roy was almost numb to the shots that rang out somewhere to his right. Three bodies fell in rapid succession, perfect shots ending their lives with as much mercy a murderer could possibly have. Their killer remained unseen, but Roy didn't need to look to know Riza had just taken three more lives.

By this point, the town was almost completely cleared out, and there really wasn't any need for further mass destruction. However, it seemed that Kimblee hadn't picked up on that particular fact. Roy had a strong feeling that the other alchemist was mentally disturbed – what other explanation was there for how he seemed to get off on indiscriminate killing? As if to reaffirm his thoughts, a loud explosion detonated several meters in front of him. Debris and splitting earth sped towards him, and Roy had to dive out of the way to avoid being swept up in the destruction. "What the hell, Kimblee?" He thundered, though he was sure his words were drowned out in the roar of the explosion. An ear-splitting crash resonated from behind him, and Roy's onyx eyes widened in horror as he turned to face the scene.

Kimblee's warpath had struck a solitary tower – an unimportant landmark, had Riza not been currently perched upon the top floor with her rifle. The sound of splintering wood and crashing rubble acted as a catalyst for Roy's adrenaline, letting him move with incredible speed over the dirt and sand. "Hawkeye! Cadet Hawkeye!" His own voice seemed to come from outside his body, sounding foreign in his moment of panic.

Riza sprinted down flight after flight of stairs, her heart racing within her chest. If she made it out of this alive, it would be a miracle. The tower was crumbling over her head and beneath her feet, and she knew she had to make a split-second decision. With only two floors left until she reached the bottom and almost no time left, Riza swung herself out of the second-story window, trying to angle her body to land where the sand seemed to be deepest. She hit the ground with a harsh thud and she felt a splintering pain in her left side, but she was alive.

A few moments after her body made contact with the ground, she felt herself being rolled over onto her back. She let out a hiss of pain as a hand made contact with her side, and her eyes squeezed shut even tighter.

"Hawkeye!"

Roy's voice was clear above her head, and she reluctantly opened her eyes to look up into his panicked face. He let out a sigh of relief when he saw that she was still conscious.

"Are you alright?"

"My side…" Riza complained, letting out another groan of protest as Roy tried to help her up.

"You!" Roy shouted, pointing at one of the two soldiers who had accompanied their group. "Go back and get Doctor Knox!"

"But Sir, Doctor Knox is the pathologist. He doesn't treat - "

"Damn it! Don't make me tell you again!" Roy barked, sending the other man running off in the direction of their camp. He narrowed his eyes when he saw Kimblee approaching them in the distance, his hands stuck in his pockets and a wry grin upon his lips. Roy scowled. "You." He said, pointing to the other soldier. "Stay with the Cadet until help arrives."

"Yes, Sir."

Roy hardly heard the young man's hasty reply as he got to his feet, stalking over towards Kimblee. He felt bile rise in the back of his throat as Kimblee arched one eyebrow at him, looking almost amused at the furious expression on his comrade's face.

"Can I help you?" Kimblee inquired in that aggravatingly calm voice of his.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Roy thundered, advancing aggressively towards the other man.

Kimblee looked taken aback at his question, and it seemed as though he genuinely had no idea what he had done wrong. "Excuse me?"

"You just blew up the tower Cadet Hawkeye was inside! She had to jump out of the window to keep you from _killing her!_"

Kimblee was silent for a long moment, looking Roy in the eye. The Flame Alchemist was livid, but, for the life of him, he couldn't quite figure out why. "What's your point?"

"You sick bastard." Roy snarled, but was cut off when Kimblee held up one of his hands.

"It's like I told you before. This is a war. People die. Sometimes people from our own side get in the way – it's called collateral damage. Why should I give a damn if she lives or dies? It's not like she's a State Alchemist. She's a sniper. The Academy is turning them out by the dozens. She's replaceable - "

Roy pulled back his fist and hit Kimblee with everything he had, punching the Crimson Alchemist square in the jaw. Kimblee didn't even flinch, and, when he looked back at Roy, his eyes were just as calm as ever. Yet, the other man wasn't about to take such actions lightly, and he made quick work of hitting Roy back.

Roy made a grab for the front of Kimblee's shirt, pulling him down as he thrust his knee up, landing a blow directly to the other alchemist's diaphragm. The most Kimblee let out was a cough, and he used his lower center of gravity to knock Roy off his feet. With a vicious grin, he stood over the Flame Alchemist, lunging down with both his palms facing outwards.

Not about to be made into a human bomb, Roy rolled away just in time, leaving Kimblee striking the ground and creating a gaping hole where he used to be. Now a safe distance away, Roy snapped his fingers, sending a stream of fire straight at Kimblee. The other alchemist was quick to avoid the attack – he wasn't too keen on getting burned alive. Roy watched confusedly as Kimblee appeared as if he were going to vomit, his chest and throat convulsing slightly.

Roy followed up his attack with several more rapid strikes, trying to anticipate where Kimblee was headed. A stream of fire hit the building beside Kimblee, causing the wall to crumble and debris to come falling down. Kimblee was able to avoid most of the rubble, but a small piece caught him above the eyebrow, giving him a moderately side gash.

Kimblee lifted his fingers to the cut, feeling blood dripping down his forehead. He pulled his hand back, taking a moment to study the red substance staining his fingertips. A sly smirk crossed his lips as he extended his tongue, lapping up his own blood. He turned his eyes back to Roy, grinning maniacally. "Is that all you've got?"

Roy fought back a grimace, unable to believe how sick and warped the Crimson Alchemist actually was. He didn't deal well with being mocked, and he was going to give everything he had to take down this disturbed man. However, before he could snap his fingers again, he felt someone come up and grab him from behind.

A quick look over his shoulder showed him Maes' frowning face as his friend pried the gloves off of his hands. "Roy, breathe." He said sternly, trying to get his best friend to calm down.

"God damn it, Maes! Let me go! I'll fucking kill him!" Roy thundered, struggling against his friend's grasp. He was perfectly aware that he was acting foolishly, but he was going to make Kimblee pay for what he did. Riza could have died!

"And you really think that's going to make me let you go?" Maes countered, his voice calm as he tried to compose Roy's temper.

Roy was about to retort when he saw another figure approaching, heading straight for Kimblee. Doctor Knox reached up and took his cigarette from between his lips as he exhaled. "Go back to camp, Kimblee. Marcoh wants to see you." He said flatly, obviously not caring if Kimblee left or stayed.

An eerie grin found its way across Kimblee's lips. "Well, I wouldn't want to keep them waiting, now, would I? Thanks, Doc." With that, he turned, heading away from the scene he had helped create.

Knox turned and looked at Roy, a frown upon his lips. "Calm yourself down. I don't have enough sedatives to spare one for your sorry ass."

Roy took a moment to breathe, trying to get his heart rate back down to normal. He could feel his blood boiling within his veins, but Riza's safety was more important to him than getting Kimblee back for what he had done. "I'm fine." He said after a minute or two. When Maes looked at him skeptically, Roy shook his head. "I'm fine, seriously. Now let me go – I have to talk to Knox."

"Roy Mustang! Get your ass in here!" Knox shouted, and Roy turned to see him sticking his head out of the door of one of the abandoned buildings. The look in the pathologist's eyes was accusing, and Roy knew exactly what the problem was.

"Shit." Roy hissed under his breath. This was exactly why he wanted to talk to Knox before he began to treat Riza. Without the proper explanation, the tattoo on her back looked severely incriminating.

"What is it?" Maes asked as he let his friend go.

"Don't worry about it, Maes." Roy said flatly, not wanting to have to let his best friend in on the secret as well. The fewer people who knew, the better. Sticking his hands in his pockets, he felt as though he were heading to trial as he walked reluctantly into what was sure to be an awkward situation.

**A/N: Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Four: Assumptions**


	4. Assumptions

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**WARNING: There's a good bit of swearing in this chapter – Knox has very colorful language :p**

**A/N: This is a continuation of the last chapter. Enjoy :)**

**Chapter Four: Assumptions**

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Knox thundered as Roy stepped through the threshold of the abandoned house. "Are you kidding me?" The doctor gestured towards Riza, whom he had been preparing to bandage just before he called Roy in. Riza was sitting upon a wooden table, her torso covered only by a black sports bra. Already, her side had begun to turn a nasty shade of purple and blue just below the hem of the elastic. She gave Roy an apologetic look before turning back to Knox.

"I was trying to tell you -"

"Can it, Missy." Knox growled, glaring at Roy. "I want Mustang here to explain himself." Faced with such a high level of stress, Knox couldn't get his new cigarette lit fast enough. He inhaled the fumes, finding that even they didn't help. His eyes narrowed at Roy. "Now, would you kindly tell me why the _fuck_ your transmutation circle is on her back?" He scoffed. "And you had the balls to call Kimblee a sicko." He said incredulously as he crossed his arms over his chest

"Now wait a second, Knox. You don't know what you're talking about." Roy began as he walked over to Riza.

"Oh, _God, _the rumors are true, aren't they?" Knox asked disgustedly, but seemed to think better of it. "No – I don't want to know." Taking another long drag from his cigarette, he frowned. "Just tell me one thing, Mustang. I want to know why."

"I didn't put it on her -"

"Bullshit."

"Damn it, Knox, would you just listen?" Roy snapped. He narrowed his obsidian eyes, determined to get his word in edgewise. Knox waved his hand dismissively, and Roy went on. "Cadet Hawkeye's father was my alchemy teacher." It was best to just tell him everything now instead of letting him infer false information. Besides, Knox was a man they could trust – if any other medic saw Riza's tattoo, things could turn bad for them very fast. Yes, it was best if he knew everything.

-x-x-x-

Knox leaned back against the wall, taking a long drag from his third cigarette. With his free hand, he reached up to rub his temples. "If I knew you were going to tell me your life story, I would have just told you to shut up when I had the chance."

"Does this mean you believe us?" Riza asked from her spot atop the wooden table.

"It doesn't matter if I believe you or not – I'd rather believe your story than anything else people might come up with." Knox pointed out.

"I don't think I need to tell you to keep quiet, do I, Knox?" Roy inquired, though his words seemed more like a threat.

"Relax, Mustang. I'm not going to tell anyone. There's no one here I like well enough to tell." Knox exhaled smoke into the air, a frown upon his lips. "But this isn't part of my job – I cut up corpses, not live people." He stood up, walking over to Riza. "I get why you don't want a medic as her doctor, but this isn't in my job description."

"You owe me." Roy hadn't wanted to pull this card, but it seemed like he didn't have a choice. He had saved Knox' life when an Ishbalan tried to ambush them; Roy would have simply let the matter go if it hadn't been necessary to bring it up now.

Knox scowled, dropping the butt of his cigarette to the floor and extinguishing it with his boot. After a moment's pause, he turned to Roy. "Fine – I'll do it; but this is the last time I ever want to hear you bring that up. We're even now, got it, Mustang?"

"Understood." Roy couldn't help but smirk at this small victory.

Knox scoffed before turning his attention to Riza. "You better not make a habit of getting hurt, you got that, Missy? Otherwise this asshole's going to end up owing _me._"

"You don't need to worry about that." Riza assured him, resisting the urge to wince as an acute pain shot up her side.

"I'm not worried." Knox stated flatly. "Mustang. You had better head back to camp soon – the brass is going to have your head for starting a fight with Kimblee. I'm sure he's already spread the word about it – both him and that Hughes friend of yours; that man gossips more than my wife."

Roy knew he was right. The upper ranks showed Kimblee unbridled favoritism – something that drove the other State Alchemists crazy. For him to have attacked Kimblee was a bold move and certainly not one that would go unpunished. He turned his eyes to Riza, looking hesitant to leave.

"Settle down, Mustang. She's fine – nothing serious. I'll get her fixed up and send her back to camp. Now go on." Knox' voice showed his impatience and Roy eventually complied. Sticking his gloveless hands in his pockets, he turned, heading out into the desert sun.

-x-x-x-

"Not only did you pull two officers from their duties in camp for your own personal crisis, you attacked and physically injured a comrade of equal rank? What do you have to say for yourself?"

"My apologies, General Hakuro. I wasn't thinking properly." Roy stood at attention, trying his hardest to portray himself as an ideal soldier.

"Clearly." Hakuro narrowed his eyes at Roy across his makeshift desk. He laced his fingers together as he placed his elbows upon the table. "You can't just run around doing whatever you want, Mustang. We have an order to keep here. If you get away with it, we'll lose what control we have here." He shook his head, clearly annoyed. "This isn't the first time I've had someone come here to complain about you. While looking out for your friends is a noble cause, I suggest you stop abusing your rank to do so. You wouldn't want to be demoted."

A frown crossed Roy's lips, and he knew exactly what Hakuro was talking about – it was clear that other soldiers had complained to Hakuro about Roy's shows of favoritism for Riza. The General's threat held not only what it seemed at face-value but also a more subtle threat beneath the surface. If Roy continued to favor Riza so blatantly, there could be cause to investigate on the grounds of a possible violation of the fraternization laws. While there was far less control and respect for the rules on the battlefield, if a higher-ranking officer directed a soldier back onto the more legal path, they had better abide.

"Yes, Sir, I understand." Roy said with a nod.

"Dismissed." Hakuro waved his hand, not even bothering to give Roy a salute.

Roy turned and walked out of the tent, heading out into the camp. A quick look around showed Riza sitting beside one of the campfires as she took her lunch from one of the officers who cooked that day. Roy walked over to her, sitting down beside her and declining the food that was offered to him. "How are you feeling?" Roy asked her, a slight frown upon his lips.

"I'm okay. Doctor Knox says I only cracked one of my ribs, so I should be fine in just a couple of days." Riza informed him as she ate her lunch. "He says I'm lucky. Apparently, he could have been a lot worse. He recommended that I don't make a habit out of jumping out of windows." She turned her head to look at him. "I saw you in General Hakuro's tent. What did he say?"

"He told me that, if I keep abusing my power, I'll be demoted." Roy frowned. "Apparently I'm not as well-liked here as I thought I was."

"None of us are. When you're in a war, you inevitably end up hating almost everyone around you."

"You're catching on." Kimblee's voice came from Riza's left, and both she and Roy turned their heads to see him approaching them. Roy scowled, but he resisted the urge to stand up and finish what he started earlier. Kimblee took a seat across from them, ignoring Roy as he turned his attention to Riza. "I'm glad to see you're alright. I never got a chance to see if you were okay before Doctor Marcoh called me back to camp. I didn't mean to hit the tower you were in – it was just a matter of circumstance. Had I known, I would have tried to aim somewhere else." The grin on his face and his concerned tone of voice were so fake that it was an insult to a genuine apology.

Riza, not wanting to stir the waters, simply nodded. "I'll be fine." She informed him, happy that Roy was nearby. Even if he had just been reprimanded and was incapable of doing anything at the present moment, it was better than being alone with Kimblee.

"Good." Kimblee smiled, and it looked unnatural on his lips. The man stood and walked across the circle, patting Riza lightly on the shoulder as he passed. "Be sure you rest up." He advised as he walked off, not bothering to look back at them.

Riza cringed at his touch, her eyes dropping to the ground for a brief moment. When she looked up, she saw Roy glaring after Kimblee's retreating form with undisguised hatred. "That bastard." He growled.

"He's just trying to get to you." Riza informed him.

"Yeah – through you. I would have kicked his ass for that if Hakuro didn't just yell at me for doing it in the first place." Roy turned back, looking at Riza. "He's screwing with you because he knows he can get to me, and it's putting you in a bad position."

"I can handle it. Really – don't worry about it." Riza tried to assure him, though she wasn't even capable of convincing herself of this fact.

"If this war doesn't kill him, I will as soon as the order to retreat is given." Roy swore, clenching his fist as he rested it on his knee.

**A/N: Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Five: Nightmares**


	5. Nightmares

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: This chapter alludes back to Chapter Five of my last fiction, **_**Pictures of the Past.**_** Go there if you want background information.**

**Chapter Five: Nightmares**

As the last bullet left the barrel of her gun, Riza knew it was better to drop her rifle and flee. She didn't know where the rest of her squadron had gone, but that wasn't something she had the luxury of concerning herself with at the moment. Right now, the only thing she was worried about was her personal safety. Her boots sunk aggravatingly into the sand, impeding her progress as she tried to propel herself forward. No matter how hard she pushed herself, she seemed to be stuck in place. She was running with everything she had, trying desperately to get away as an Ishbalan soldier approached her from the side, a knife glinting in his hand; with a shout, he rushed at her, thrusting the blade into her side with an upward motion –

Riza shot straight up on her pallet, breathing heavily. Her skin was covered in a thin layer of cold sweat, and she rubbed her damp forehead with her fingertips as she tried to calm herself down. This wasn't the first time she had had this nightmare, but it scared her every time it appeared behind her closed eyelids. She glanced over to the other side of the tent, relieved to see that her tent-mate was still asleep. Rebecca Catalina could sleep through anything. Perfectly aware that she wouldn't be falling back asleep soon, Riza threw off her blankets and pulled on her boots before slipping silently out of the tent.

The cool desert air nipped slightly at her damp skin, but she found the sensation to be almost reassuring; after dreams like that, it was a relief to feel the sensations that forced you to know you were alive. Her nightmare that evening had been one of the better ones – some of the others kept her from having a chance to fall back asleep at all. Those were the dreams that involved not herself, but rather the people she cared about; all too vividly could she see Rebecca or Maes being struck to the ground (or, worst of all, Roy.) She shook her head, forcing herself not to dwell upon worse nightmares as she headed through the rows of tents and away from the women's section of camp. They were situated away from the men, and, incidentally, the campfires and other amenities benefited to the majority population of the camp.

She headed over to the dwindling fire left by some night owl, surprised that she was lucky enough to have its light and warmth this late at night. She wished she had brought her white cloak along with her – the air was too cool for just a pair of pants and a tank top. Sitting down close to the fire, she drew her arms around herself, taking silent comfort in the warmth and the self-reassuring gesture.

It wasn't long before she heard movement behind her, and she turned her head to peer off into the darkness. She could just make out a shadowy figure slipping out of a nearby tent, but she couldn't identify the body. Deciding that it mattered little in the grand scheme of things (rules like lights out were seldom enforced), she turned back to the fire. Whoever it was seemed to want company, however, because she could hear the distinctive sound of feet traversing over sand as the person approached her.

"Mind if I join you?"

Riza turned her head to see Roy standing behind her, his hair disheveled and a black military-issue coat draped over his shoulders atop his sleep-clothes. She nodded, and he pulled up one of the makeshift chares that had been left around the fire. "Couldn't sleep, either?" He inquired, looking over at her.

Riza shook her head. "Not after the dream I had." Before he could ask, she lifted her eyes to his, stating "I don't want to talk about it."

Roy didn't want to press her on the matter; he was awake for the exact same reason, and he knew how nightmares could haunt the psyche. The pair sat in silence for a while, listening to the absence of sound within the sleeping camp. This late at night, one could almost forget they were at war. He looked over when he saw Riza shiver, and he asked "Why don't you get your coat?"

"Rebecca's asleep; I don't want to wake her up."

Rebecca wasn't Roy's favorite person by any means, but he was willing to put up with her for Riza's sake. Al the same, he could understand why Riza didn't want to wake up her friend – the woman was positively evil when the wake-up call was sounded in the morning. There were times when he could hear her from his own tent. "Here." Roy pulled the black coat from around his shoulders and handed it to Riza.

"I'm not taking your coat." Riza stated flatly, knowing that he was just as vulnerable to the cold as she was.

"Don't make me order you." Roy countered, smirking slightly as she tried to remain defiant while taking the coat from him. He made sure she put it on, knowing her well enough to assume she would try to give it back. Seeing that the fire was dwindling, he reached over into the pocket of his coat and withdrew his gloves so that he could relight the blaze. A single spark sent the flame springing upwards once more, warming the surrounding area.

Riza drew Roy's coat around herself, secretly taking pleasure in the fact that it smelled just like him. This was the first time since their unorthodox reunion that they were able to be (relatively) alone with one another. Rather than talking like they probably should have, they lapsed into their same old comfortable silence in which words were not needed to express thoughts. Only, here, they were incapable of showing any affection for one another.

"I don't want to have to wake up tomorrow just to kill more innocent people." Riza murmured, wanting to be quiet despite the fact that all their comrades were fast asleep. She placed her elbows on her knees and rested her head in her hands.

Roy reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder – even this was a risk in their present environment – but he knew he couldn't reassure her. Any attempt to make her feel better would be in vain; all he could do was stay with her. He knew personally how painful the remorse could be, especially when it hit this late at night and when no one was around to listen.

"Let's take a walk." He suggested, getting to his feet and offering Riza his hand. She looked at it blankly for a moment before wrapping her hand around his, allowing him to help her up. The pair slipped quietly past the rows of tents, making as little sound as possible so that they wouldn't be discovered. It wasn't until the camp was at least one-hundred yards behind them that either spoke again.

Riza turned to Roy, inquiring "Do you remember when my father first told you he would take you on as an apprentice? I thought you were going to fly because you were so happy."

"It felt like I could." Roy recounted, able to vividly recall that day.

"Who would have thought it would have led us here?" Riza mused remorsefully, her eyes drifting up to the starry night sky. Silence fell between them once more, but she broke it when she posed the question that had been plaguing her for months – even years: "Do you still love me?"

Roy turned to look at her, surprised by her question. It wasn't so much the wording as it was the fact that she felt she needed to ask it in the first place. "Of course I do." He responded without hesitation. She should know by now just how much she meant to him. For her to even question that fact was enough to sting him slightly.

"I waited for you." Riza informed him, drawing his coat a little tighter around herself. "I waited for you, and now that I found you again, we can't even do anything about it." She shook her head before letting out a short, almost cynical laugh. "Is that what 'equivalent exchange' is? We take the lives of countless innocent people, and life brings us together only to separate us more than it ever has?"

Roy didn't have an answer for her. She was incredibly intelligent, and she had a point, even if it did sound a little jaded. A battlefront wasn't exactly a prime place for a relationship to prosper, even if it hadn't been expressly forbidden by the military's fraternization laws. General Hakuro had made it very clear that he wouldn't hesitate to have Roy court marshaled if there was any reasonable suspicion of him having a relationship with Riza, and Roy knew he would make good on that threat. Whatever he did now, he would have to be extremely careful.

Deciding that the risks were relatively low at the moment, he walked over to her and pulled her into his arms, holding her against his chest. He had almost forgotten what she smelled like – only now her scent was mixed with that of sand and sweat, just like his own. He felt her arms wrap around him in return, and she buried her face in his neck. He had no idea how long they stood like that, but it could have been a second or an eternity before they finally released one another.

"You didn't have to do this." Roy stated as he looked down at her. What happened to her plans of selling the house and moving to Central, of living a normal and productive lie? She could be living a happy life, secure in what she had, rather than risking everything on a battlefield.

Riza lifted her eyes to his, her facial expression one of complete seriousness. "Yes, I did." She informed him. The fact of the matter was that she would follow him anywhere, no matter what the cost ended up being. Already, she had followed him straight into the depths of hell itself, and she wasn't going to turn back now. His reaffirmation of his feelings for her only made her more certain in her decision. No matter what, she would be by his side, even if it ended up killing her.

**A/N: So this chapter completely threw me for a loop – instead of getting from point A to point B, I somehow was pulled along to points D, F, V, Z, and every other letter in between. Yet, somehow, I think it turned out better this way. Such is life.**

**Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Six: Warped Perspectives**


	6. Warped Perspectives

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: I am sorry this chapter has taken so long for me to write. In between finals and projects, my next few chapters will be a bit sporadic. Just bear with me – I promise it will be worth it.**

**Chapter Six: Warped Perspectives**

The Ishbalan capitol had put up a strong resistance, but even it had to fall when faced with the overwhelming oppression of the Amestrian military. Under orders from the Fuhrer, relentless genocide had once more been carried out, turning a city full of life into a ghost town whose streets were littered with blood and bodies. Evidently, someone saw this as a grand success, and permission was given throughout the camps for soldiers to take the night to celebrate if they so chose. While it remained unspoken, it was clear that the higher-ups would be turning a blind eye to whatever might transpire that evening. Understandably, most of the soldiers were thrilled about the privilege of indulging in things normally forbidden by the strict military rules.

Riza, however, was not so excited.

"Come on, Riza. Have a little fun for once in your life. All you've done for weeks is sit around and mope. You're going to freeze that way if you don't get up and move. Now, come on; there's a party going on outside, and you're coming with me, whether you want to or not." Rebecca implored as she looked down at her friend, both her lip and her right hip jutting out slightly out of habit from trying to get what she wanted. "Half the guys in camp are total creeps, and there's no way I'm going out there alone."

Riza sighed, looking up at her friend from her spot on her pallet. "I already told you I don't want to go. Celebrating like this is sick and twisted."

"Just because everyone else doesn't want to sit around and mope, that makes them twisted? Gee, thanks, Riza." Rebecca rolled her eyes and scoffed indignantly as she crossed her arms.

Riza couldn't help but feel a pang of pity for Rebecca. She, like so many others in camp, was trying to live in a perpetual state of denial. It was clear to Riza that this celebration was to simply reinforce the idea that killing thousands of innocent people was actually a _good_ thing; however, it seemed as though she was the only one who could see this fact. "You know I didn't mean it like that." She frowned, knowing that Rebecca would hold it over her head for ages unless she complied. "Fine, I'll go with you, but I'm not staying any longer than an hour."

Rebecca beamed as she reached down, grabbing Riza's hands and helping her to her feet. "Great – an hour it is, then!" She hardly gave Riza enough time to pull on her boots before leading her out of the tent.

Apparently, some of the soldiers had taken the time to loot a few of the homes within the capitol, and there was an ample supply of alcohol circulating around the center of camp where everyone had gathered. It made Riza sick to think that people could have the gall to steal from those they murdered in cold blood, and she turned down everything that was offered to her. It seemed that the other soldiers were more willing to accept her now that they were in good spirits, even if it was only temporary.

As she took a seat on one of the makeshift chairs, her eyes scanned the group of people in search of a familiar face. Eventually, she was able to catch a glimpse of Maes, but Roy was nowhere to be found. Rebecca, who had taken a seat next to her, tried to follow her gaze but couldn't see who or what Riza was looking for. It wasn't long before Rebecca saw someone approach Riza from the side, and she automatically assumed that was who Riza had been looking for.

"Do either of you ladies want a drink?"

Riza looked up at Kimblee's smiling face with undisguised disdain. "I don't drink." She stated flatly, a frown upon her lips.

"I'll take one." Rebecca returned Kimblee's smile as she took the bottle he offered her. "I don't think we've met."

"I'm State Alchemist Solf J. Kimbee. And you are?" Kimblee inquired as he helped himself to a nearby seat.

"Cadet Rebecca Catalina."

Riza stifled a groan, thoroughly annoyed. It wasn't as though she could blatantly tell Rebecca what type of man Kimblee was while he was sitting right there. She supposed it was partially her fault for not telling Rebecca about him earlier.

"Riza?" Rebecca's voice interrupted her train of thought, and Riza realized she had been gazing off into space.

Riza blinked her eyes and lifted her chin out of her hand. "What?"

"Major Kimblee was just asking you about how your side has been feeling."

Resisting the urge to scowl, Riza looked over at Kimblee, a frown upon her lips. "Just fine." Her voice was sharp, bordering on a snap.

Taking her attitude in stride, Kimblee only smiled. "That's good to hear. I saw your work on the battlefield today; it seems not to have affected your aim." The left corner of his mouth curled upwards slightly – an imperceptible change to anyone not looking for it.

The movement didn't escape Riza's trained eyes, and the message was all too clear: _I'm not complimenting you; I'm making it clear that I've been watching you._ Riza tried to ignore the chill that ran up her spine as her instincts told her to get as far away from Kimblee as humanly possible.

"You two fought together?" Rebecca asked, looking between the two of them.

"Oh, yes. Cadet Hawkeye here has made an excellent impression upon the senior staff. She's been placed on several elite squadrons along with me and several other State Alchemists. It's highly impressive." Kimblee commented, smiling at Riza in a manner she knew to be fake.

Rebecca, however, was falling for his act and blindly accepting his façade. She was oblivious to Riza's present discomfort, and Riza didn't quite know how to handle the situation at hand. She knew that ignoring Kimblee was getting her nowhere, and she was beginning to suspect that he wasn't just bothering her to get to Roy; if that were the case, he would have no reason to torment her now, when Roy was nowhere to be found. No, she suspected he was enjoying his ability to make her squirm, and Riza was now aware that she was a target at any time.

Riza could hear footsteps moving over the sand towards them, and she looked up to see Maes approaching them. By this time, one of the soldiers had taken out a guitar that Riza assumed had also been taken from a home in the capitol, and the clearing had begun to fill with music. When Maes reached them, he smiled down at Riza and offered her his hand.

"May I have this dance?" He inquired, looking down at her through his glasses.

While she normally would have turned him down – dancing wasn't her cup of tea – Riza was thrilled to have any excuse to get away from Kimblee. "Sure." She agreed, placing her hand in his and letting him help her to her feet. She knew Rebecca could handle herself, and she didn't regret her decision as they walked away from Kimblee. "Thank you." She said, looking up at Maes with sincere gratitude.

"No problem." Maes grinned. "I'm sorry I couldn't get you away from that creep sooner." He cast a glance back over his shoulder. "Will your friend be okay?"

"She's fine. Rebecca wouldn't think twice about messing someone up if she felt threatened." By the time Riza looked back, Kimblee was excusing himself from Rebecca's presence. She couldn't help but feel a little relieved that she wasn't leaving Rebecca alone with him, but she was aware that her best friend was going to be annoyed and would probably confront her later about all the (apparent) attention she was receiving.

"He really is out to get you." Maes muttered darkly as he began to dance with her, aware that Kimblee was probably still watching.

"Tell me about it." Riza said with a frown. "I always feel like he's watching me. I don't understand."

"It doesn't matter why he's doing it – just watch your back. I don't trust him as far as I could throw him." Maes looked down at her. "Roy told me what happened when you fell from that tower; I don't think it was an accident like Kimblee claims."

"I know it wasn't. He keeps feigning sympathy for me."

"I can't tell if he's trying to hurt you or if he's just toying with you."

"Does it matter?" Riza pointed out, arching an eyebrow at him.

"Good point." Maes took a moment to scan the crowd as he and Riza moved to the music. "I don't see him. It's freaky when I don't know where he is."

"Welcome to my life." Riza muttered as her eyes scanned the crowd for a different reason. "Do you know where Major Mustang is?"

Maes held back a chuckle. He should have known Riza would have preferred to spend time with his friend rather than himself. He didn't blame her – he would rather be dancing with Gracia than Riza, after all. "He's probably still in his tent. I tried to get him to leave, but he just wanted to mope around." There was no further sign of Kimblee, and Maes assumed it was safe to move away from Riza by the time the music ended.

"I think I'll go find him." Riza informed Maes, stepping back from him.

"Fine by me." Maes said with a shrug. "Just don't let your friend see you – I think she's jealous enough as it is." He let out a chuckle, shaking his head. He moved to walk away from her, but stopped as a thought occurred to him. "Oh, and Riza? Make sure Roy isn't drinking anything. He gets dark when he drinks." He seemed to be speaking from experience, and Riza wasn't about to question him.

"Right." Riza said with a nod, "And thanks again." With that, she turned and walked away from the center of camp, unsure whether or not an hour had passed since her arrival.

Maes shook his head, sticking his hands in his pockets as he walked off to take a seat by one of the fires. If there was one thing more warped than the perspectives of war, it was the people, and even he was no exception.

**A/N: Yeah, I know Roy didn't show his face in this chapter, but he just needed to sit this one out for everything to work the way I wanted it to. Such is life. :p**

**Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Seven: Promises **


	7. Promises

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: Sorry about my hiatus. Life decided to get crazy on me, but I hope to begin posting chapters like normal from this point on. It's long overdue, but, finally, here's:**

**Chapter Seven: Promises**

"What are we doing here?"

Roy drew his fingertip over the brim of his cup, gazing absently into the amber liquid inside. He wasn't really expecting an answer to his question, but the one he received almost made him smirk.

"We're fighting a war."

It was just like Riza to be blunt with her responses, even when the question was rhetorical. She looked over at Roy, watching him trace the edge of his glass. "Don't tell Maes I gave you that."

Roy scoffed. "Please. I'm a grown man. I'll drink if I want to, and he needs to mind his own business." As if in defiance, he drained the contents of his glass before reaching for the bottle they had placed between them. In the safety of his tent, they were shut off from the world, if only for a little while.

"He says you've been acting more hollow than usual." Riza knew she was straying into dangerous ground, but it was an issue that had to be addressed.

"Like I said – he needs to mind his own damned business." Roy snapped, and he instantly felt sorry for his tone. Heaving a sigh, he added. "You said it yourself: we're in a war. Killing people isn't exactly the highlight of my day."

Silence lapsed between them, and Riza dropped her gaze down to the cup between her hands. "General Hakuro congratulated me after my shift today. He told me what a good job I was doing. Said he'd never seen a sniper with my skill." In any other situation, this could have been taken as praise. In Ishbal, Riza saw it as a condemnation of her actions. "I've killed so many people… I've looked in children's faces as I pull the trigger on my gun." She shook her head, trying to keep her voice from breaking. "I don't know how much longer I can do this."

"We don't have a choice." Roy was trying to be sympathetic, but he was feeling the same distress in his own way. When it came to pain, he turned it into fuel for anger, making him a bitter person.

"What if we die here?"

Riza's question caught Roy completely off guard, and he turned his head to look at her, mouth agape.

"It's a war. People die every day. Their bodies are carried off the battlefield by stretchers. I've seen it and so have you. All it takes is one bullet. I know that better than anyone. One bullet can end a person's life. And then what? My father always said that people were just energy moving about the earth. Death is the end of it. There's nothing afterwards; I was raised to believe that. That's what we're doing here – turning people into nothingness. The world doesn't care if one person dies." Riza's fingers tightened around the cup in her hands, her knuckles turning white as her hands began to shake. "I'm nineteen years old, Roy. If I die on that battlefield, the most I'll ever get is my name in a list in some newspaper. I don't even think anyone would bother to claim my body when it was brought back to Central…"

"Don't say that!" Roy's hand shot out, grabbing Riza by her upper arm. His cup clattered to the ground, seeping the dirt with alcohol. Their eyes met when she looked up in surprise, and he pinned her with his obsidian gaze. "I'll be damned if I let you die here. I made a promise to your father; I swore that I'd protect you. Mark my words, Riza: I am not going to let you die here."

Any words of protest died on Riza's tongue when she saw the intensity with which he was looking at her. Roy had always been a man of his word, and she had always believed him. If he said he would keep her safe, she knew he would do just that. "I believe you." She murmured, trying to move her arm out of Roy's tight grasp.

Roy loosened his grip, not having realized how tightly he was holding onto her. "I don't like hearing you say such dark things."

"And how do you think I feel when you shut yourself up in your tent like this? It's clear to everyone that you're brooding, but you never let anyone help you. You don't have to do this alone, Roy." Riza absentmindedly placed the cap on the bottle of alcohol, assuming Roy had already had enough. If this was his mood now, she certainly didn't want to see him drunk. Maes had been right, of course; she'd been stupid to let him indulge in a few glasses.

"I know. Maybe once all of this is over, I'll be willing to accept that. But for now, it's best if I try to live in a state of denial. If I try to face my sins now, I don't think I'd be able to get off this battlefield alive. As long as this war is going on, it's better to assume the government is doing what's right, even if we know better. It's the only way we're going to live." It might be cynical of him, but Roy truly believed that denial was the best approach to war.

"Then promise me you won't die." Riza said sternly, her eyes fixed on Roy's. She wanted his word that he'd live in denial if that was what it took for him to make it out of the war.

Roy's lips quirked up slightly on the right side as he countered "Only if you do the same."

**A/N: I know it' short, but the chapters should be back to normal soon.**

**Rate and review! :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Eight: Riot**


	8. Riot

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: Just so everyone knows, I'll be out of town for the better part of the next three weeks. I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can, but it might not be until August. That's the reason why I put out this chapter early.**

**Chapter Eight: Riot**

"Everyone at arms! We have a riot situation in the Ishbalan capitol! Troops depart in three minutes!"

Riza awoke with a start as one of the female soldiers rushed between the tents, repetitively shouting out the orders. From a distance away, she could hear a male voice doing the same thing. She shot up in her bed, taking a moment to grab her pillow and throw it at Rebecca, who had remained asleep. "Wake up, Rebecca! We have to get going!"

It took her less than a minute to strip out of her pajamas and pull on her uniform, managing to put it on in the darkness of their tent. After fumbling around for a moment, she tugged on her boots and grabbed her blue jacket before rushing out of the tent, not bothering to wait for Rebecca. She needed to run to the tent keeping their weapons and stock up for the battle. The camp was total chaos as she weaved through the tents, but she managed to make her way to the armory before the call came that there was only a minute left.

Her hand shot out for a holster with two pistols already inside, and she fastened it under her bust before grabbing extra ammunition. The last thing she took was a sniper rifle, which she slung over her shoulder. She still had yet to put on her jacket, but that wasn't her first priority. Her boots raced across the sand as fast as she could move, and she soon placed herself in the lineup gathering just outside camp. She took a moment to remove her rifle and slip on her jacket, buttoning up the front before slinging her rifle across her back.

"Hawkeye!" General Hakuro's voice rang out, and Riza snapped into a salute.

"Sir!"

"Go join Mustang's squadron. You are to take back the Ishbalan temple." Hakuro barked, and it was clear that he wouldn't be entertaining any protest.

"Yes, Sir!" Riza nodded before leaving her place in line, hastening over to Roy's side.

"When we get to the temple, I want to make a path inside so that we can attempt to keep the Ishbalans out. If they've already broken inside, it's our job to clear them out. If I'm not mistaken, there's a back door and windows we can access from either the road behind of the buildings beside. If we need to, we can force our way in by breaking a window or two. The only problem with that is that the Ishbalan rioters would be able to use the same path. Our orders are to kill, so it might be best to take down as many as we can before breaking inside." Roy stood with his arms crossed over his chest, giving orders to those assigned to his unit.

Roy looked around at the faces before him, assessing what he had to work with. Charlie stood ready with a machine gun in his hands, looking rather threatening. Riza was heavily armed, and the fact that she was in his unit reassured Roy more than words could say. They were accompanied by the rest of Roy's unit, and Roy had little doubt that this mission would go off without a hitch. He trusted his men with his life, and the fact that he didn't have to worry about Riza's safety without him was enough to keep his mind more focused on the task at hand. "Let's move out."

The entire group snapped to attention, barking a collective "Yes, Sir!"

-x-x-x-

The Ishbalan capitol was in a complete state of chaos. Any survivors of the last raid had rallied themselves together in a last-ditch effort to reclaim their city, and there was nothing more desperate than a dwindling nation of people who had lost everything they ever had. The only thing they had left to cling to was their religion, and the people were desperate to get into their scared temple of the god Ishbala.

"Forty, forty-five tops. One hundred meters south-east, enraged. It doesn't look like they've been able to break down the doors yet, Sir." Riza reported as she surveyed the scene through the scope of her rifle. She moved her gun away from her face and straightened up, turning to face Roy. "They're in a state of disarray. I don't think they're organized enough to set traps for us, but we should be careful nonetheless."

"Right. I want as many of them taken out from here as possible. Scatter so they can't locate our exact position. Once their numbers are down, we can move in from the ground and finish it there. At that point, we break into the temple and keep it under our control." Roy ordered. "No more than three officers to every rooftop. Watch for my signal to move in on the ground. When I use my alchemy, make your way down."

"Sir!" After a brief salute, Roy's squadron scattered, setting up a semi-circle around the front of the temple.

Riza knelt back down, taking cover against the high wall of the roof. Roy joined her a second later, hiding himself until the moment was right for him to strike.

"Fire." Roy ordered.

Riza nodded, lifting her scope to her eye to survey the scene below. It seemed as though the group of Ishbalans was centering around one man, and Riza knew that a leader was the worst thing for a rebellion. She singled out her target, gauging distance and elevation. With a slight movement of her trigger, a shot rang out through the night, shortly followed by panicked screams. The leader crumpled to the ground in a pool of his own blood, and it was half a second later that more shots sounded from Riza's left and right, causing more rebels to fall in their tracks.

Shot after shot, Riza indiscriminately fired as Ishbalans passed in her line of sight. It was her orders to kill, and she knew she would come to terms with what she did here tonight at a later date. For the time being, it was easier to just blindly follow the orders given to her by her superior officers.

When there were only a few rebels left firing desperate shots back at their attackers, Roy stood and snapped his fingers. An unrelenting wave of fire streamed down from the rooftop, engulfing the dead and survivors alike in flame. The look in Roy's eyes was cold, and Riza hardly recognized his voice as he spoke his next order.

"Let's move."

**A/N: Reviews make me a happy writer :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Nine: Damage Control**


	9. Damage Control

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: I'll do my best to update frequently, but I start school next week so the chapters might be a little chaotic for a week or so.**

**Chapter Nine: Damage Control**

The doors to the Ishbalan temple broke open with a bang, slamming inwards against the intricately ornamented walls on either side of the entryway. With a snap of his fingers, Roy used his alchemy to light the candles within the room, giving the temple a dim illumination so that they were capable of seeing as they rushed inside. The candles were scattered around the sides of the room resting upon what Riza assumed to be some sort of offering tables, but the majority of them were arranged in some sort of pattern around a mural at the front of the temple. It wasn't clear to Riza what it depicted, but she was certain that it was a scene having to do something with the Ishbalan religion. Having been raised an atheist, the idea of religion was strange to her; yet she was certain it would have been a sin to kill a handful of Ishbalans outside the doors of their own sanctuary.

There would be plenty of time to ponder that fact later, though. She squinted as the lights suddenly came on in the church, shortly followed by a chuckle and the statement "Let there be light." She couldn't be sure which of her comrades had made the pun, but it seemed a little more sacrilege than usual when they were standing in a temple.

"Charlie, Anderson – block up the door." Roy ordered as he strode down the aisle between the wooden pews. "Matthews, Jackson, McNeil – scan the temple for any sign of intruders. Connors, Burke – secure the back door." As he reached the front of the temple, he turned back around to face his men. "Hawkeye, come with me." With that, Roy headed for one of the doors at the back of the temple just to the left of the mural.

Riza reached inside her jacket, withdrawing one of the pistols she had brought with her in a safety precaution. She followed after Roy as everyone else scattered to do what they had been ordered. Highly aware of the sound of her own heartbeat, Riza followed Roy through the door, trying to make as little sound as possible. There was always a chance that an ambush had been planned, and one false move could get them killed. As she looked at the man in front of her, slipping through the darkness, she couldn't help but morbidly wonder if this was the last time she would see him alive.

No, she decided with a shake of her head. She couldn't think like that, and it simply wouldn't happen. Roy Mustang was too skilled to fall in the line of duty. It just wasn't a possibility.

The further they traveled down the hallway, the darker it got and the further away the voices of their comrades seemed. The temple was large, and it would take a great deal of effort from everyone involved if they were to secure the entire building. As Riza was mulling over these thoughts, Roy stopped abruptly, and Riza lifted her gun in anticipation of what he had seen.

Rather than attacking, Roy turned around and placed one hand atop her gun, guiding it down. "Listen to me. Whatever happens here tonight, you are to make sure that you stay safe. That's an order. If things get too dangerous, I want you to run. I don't care what happens to me or the others – if things look bad, get yourself out. Do you understand?"

"But -" Riza began, only to be cut off.

"This isn't up for discussion." Roy said firmly.

Riza's lips pulled down into a frown, and she looked up at Roy with defiance in her eyes. "Fine. But I will be fighting up until that point. Until my own personal judgment tells me things are too dangerous, I'll be right alongside you."

Roy knew perfectly well that Riza wouldn't consider something too dangerous until she was injured and the last one standing, but if there was even a hope of her agreeing to get herself out alive, he would take what he could get. He let out a sigh, resisting the urge to cross his arms over his chest. "That's it?"

"That's it." Riza stated flatly. "And it's not up for discussion."

No matter how old she got, Riza always seemed to have that same fiery disposition just beneath the surface, and Roy wouldn't have traded that trait for anything in the world. He stepped closer to her, closing the small distance between them before bending down to press his lips to hers. To his surprise and joy, she didn't fight him back, but instead wrapped her arms around his neck and responded to the gesture.

The kiss didn't last long, but it lingered far longer than was safe for them to have done. There was a chance that both of them would die in this church, and neither of them saw any harm in sharing a moment away from any prying eyes. Naturally, Riza was the first to pull away, regaining her senses faster than Roy. "We need to get moving."

"You're right." Roy agreed, stepping back from her. "We have a job to do."

The two of them scanned every room they passed, making sure that no one was hiding inside the temple. By the time they had gone full-circle and re-entered the main room, the rest of their squadron had gathered around the barricaded main doors.

Charlie turned around to face Roy. "Sir, we did our best to block off the doors, but I don't know if it will hold if more Ishbalans try to storm the temple."

An ear-splitting crash came from above their heads, and remnants of a stained glass window cascaded down off the balcony rimming the inside of the temple walls.

Roy frowned as he said "I don't think it's the door we need to worry about."

**A/N: Reviews are love :)**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Ten: Thou Shalt Not Kill**


	10. Thou Shalt Not Kill

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: Until I figure out my schedule, the chapters may be a little helter-skelter, but I whipped this up for you guys because I love you that much :)**

**Chapter Ten: Thou Shalt Not Kill**

Intricately painted glass cascaded down from the sky, crashing into thousands of pieces as the shards shattered upon the tile floor. The splintering sound of glass was accompanied by the heavy thud of feet making contact with the ground as rebel Ishbalans forced their way into the temple through their crude entrance. An attack was something that had been expected; an organized ambush was a different story. The fact that the Ishbalans put so much thought into the attack meant that they were serious about taking back their city, as though it was the last chance they would have.

Charlie fired the first shot, taking down an Ishbalan within a relatively short distance. The man standing beside his fallen comrade lifted his voice in indignation, roaring "You dare kill a man in his own sanctuary?!" Before he was able to aim his rifle, Charlie fired a second bullet, stopping the threat with a cold look in his eyes. This was what had to be done, and he was a loyal soldier. Roy had made it clear that they were to shoot to kill - clearly orders passed down from the higher-ups - but he would follow them all the same.

At that moment, chaos began to envelop the temple. With two comrades dead, the Ishbalan soldiers began fighting with a vengeance. Orders weren't necessary for the Amestrian soldiers to spring into action. Riza dove for cover behind one of the wooden pews, firing bullet after bullet at the insurgents. A splintering crash sounded from behind her, but she didn't dare turn her head to look at the source. Doing so would have been suicide. As she kept her eyes on the rebels opening fire in front of her, she could hear more hurried footsteps behind her from near the source of the crash. As a sniper, she had learned to identify sounds, and the footsteps weren't those of feet encased in standard issue boots. By process of elimination, they were enemies.

Riza's heart skipped a beat as she heard a bullet stream past her head, barely missing. It had come from behind, and she threw herself to the ground to safely regain her senses. They were becoming surrounded, and it was becoming increasingly difficult for her to safely shoot at her targets. If this kept up, she would be forced to stand and simply hope she was lucky enough not to be fatally wounded.

Before Riza was able to lift herself off the ground, she felt a rush of hot air travel over her back. A split second later, there was a loud crack behind her accompanied by a piercing scream. Daring to look, she caught a glimpse of the charring remains of a man crumbling to the ground not three meters behind her. A look in front of her showed her Roy, standing with a harsh look in his eyes as he watched the man burn. Words weren't needed for Riza to ascertain that he had just saved her life. With a short nod, Riza rose to her feet, firing off another round of bullets before changing the magazine and withdrawing her second gun. They were outnumbered, but the Amestrian soldiers held the advantage in skill. Yet what the Ishbalans lacked in prowess they made up for in passion. These men were fighting for the last thing they had left, and it was clear they were willing to die for it.

Riza evaded the bullets being shot at her, but she found herself being backed into a corner by her assailants. She didn't want to leave her back open, but it was proving more and more difficult to stay covered. A quick glance around showed that her comrades were having a similar problem. Despite taking out a large part of the Ishbalan forces, they were still sorely outnumbered. She quickened her pace back as she fired relentlessly, hoping for a bit of cover.

A gasp escaped her lips as her back, instead of hitting cool stone, smacked against something that was warm and definitely made of flesh. With speed powered by adrenaline, she sprung back, pointing her guns at the strange figure. Relief flooded her eyes as she saw Roy standing before her, gloved hands raised and her expression mirrored upon his face. In a fraction of a second, they exchanged a look that set up a plan between them.

Immediately after, Riza whipped back around, pressing her back against Roy's as she opened fire once more on their attackers. Despite the fact that she could feel him moving behind her, dodging attacks from his end, they were able to keep their contact as they took on the Ishbalan forces as a whirlwind. It was clear that, together, they were nearly unstoppable. Roy's flame alchemy engulfed anyone in its path, and Riza cleanly knocked down enemy after enemy before swiftly changing the magazines of her guns.

One last bullet struck the final Ishbalan standing in the temple, and the Amestrian soldiers were now left standing in a room full of bodies. Riza and Roy separated, both breathing heavily. Roy did a brief headcount, relieved to see that he hadn't lost a single man in their standoff. Gunfire was still audible from outside, but even that died down after a few short minutes. The all-clear was sounded, and Roy visibly relaxed. They had stopped the riot, and he had managed to keep his promise to protect Riza no matter what.

Riza had to step over several fallen bodies to make her way to the front doors of the temple, and she helped her comrades move away the barricade they had erected. The sight that awaited them outside was no better than the one they created within the walls of the temple. Bodies lay upon the bloody sand, crippled and broken. And yet it was with a distant sense of indifference that Riza made her way onto the main road. She felt numb, just like she always did after such an event.

She fell into the group of soldiers making their way back to camp, not wanting to linger there any more than the others. What they had done that night was unforgivable, but they all would eventually find their own way to cope with the blood stains on their hands. At the moment, however, they had lapsed into silence. As the sun began to rise over the dunes on the outskirts of the Ishbalan capitol, Riza turned her eyes to glance over at Roy. She was unsurprised to find that he had looked over at her as well, and their mutual disbelief and horror at their actions remained unspoken. Tears would be shed at a later date, but, for now, the reality of their actions had yet to fully kick in. On the battlefield, there was no room for regrets.

**A/N: Reviews are appreciated and adored.**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Eleven: Scars**


	11. Scars

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: I borrowed some of the dialogue from volume 15 of the manga. As always, I ad-lib from memory.**

**Chapter Eleven: Scars**

With the final raid on the capitol city, the rebel Ishbalan forces seemed to finally relent. Mercilessly, the Amestrian military had ripped from them their last thread of hope, breaking it into pieces as bodies fell into the sand-covered streets. No one left alive had made it out without losing someone dear to them, and those that were lucky enough to live couldn't have seen their lives as anything but bleak and meaningless. In the time of less than a year, Fuehrer King Bradley had managed to crush the spirit of a once-proud race of people, and no one, not even the soldiers clad in blue, would ever be the same after this experience.

Wordlessly, Riza placed another handful of sand and gravel onto the pie before her, smoothing it down as best she could. She didn't have a shovel, but somehow the more intense manual labor made the task more meaningful. With each handful of sand she had scooped out of the shallow grave, she felt the smallest part of her transgressions being wiped away. Unfortunately, she had a feeling that it would take much more than this simple gesture to atone for everything she had done in this unforgiving desert.

Her comrades passed by her without the slightest bit of regard as to what she was doing, and that was perfectly fine with Riza. She preferred not to talk to any of them, anyway. They would understand her pain, but they were too afraid of their own sins to account for them. It would probably be years before they sat down and confronted themselves, but Riza was already in the midst of that personal hell. It was unfortunate, because she doubted she would ever really be free from the chains that tied her to the harsh Ishbalan land. With a small sigh, she stood and walked over to one of the collapsed buildings nearby. With a twist and a pull, she dislodged a piece of a wooden beam, ignoring the pain in her hands that arose as her skin slipped over the splintered wood.

Kneeling back down, Riza gently inserted the piece of wood into the pile of sand she had created, forcing it to stand erect by piling more sand around the base. It was small, and it certainly wasn't anything extravagant, but it was the least she could do.

"Aren't you coming?"

Riza didn't turn around when she heard Roy speak. Instead, she took it upon herself to smooth out the top of the mound with her hands, making it look as presentable as possible.

"You're going to get left behind."

She heard the shifting of sand as Roy took a step towards her, but she still didn't acknowledge his presence. It was a moment before he spoke again.

"A fallen comrade?"

Riza bowed her head slightly, moving her hands away from the small grave she had created. She blinked her eyes once before she worked up the courage to turn back around and face Roy. "No. It's an Ishbalan child. His body was left by the side of the road. I thought it was the least I could do…" She trailed off, her hazel eyes dropping to the ground at her feet.

Roy's lips pulled downwards into a frown as he gave her a look of undisguised sympathy. "The war's over now. We can go home."

"The war will never be over." Riza protested, her fingers closing around the fabric of her standard issue military pants. "Not inside of me; inside, it will never end. It was my decision to give you my father's secrets. It was my decision to join the military academy. I wanted to help people, and I naively thought this was the way to do it. I see now that it was my personal decisions that brought me here – that brought _us_ here. I'm a killer, and no amount of repentance will ever change that." She broke off, biting down on her lower lip as she inhaled a shaky breath. She closed her eyes and exhaled after a long moment, her voice determined. "I want you to burn my back. Burn it beyond recognition."

Roy's eyes flew wide, and he instinctively took a step forward as he shouted in protest. "What?! I could never do that!"

"You have to!" Riza shouted with her last ounce of determination. When she spoke again, her voice was shaking. "If I can't fix what I've done here, the least I can do is prevent the creation of another flame alchemist. I want the secrets on by back to be burned to the point that they become illegible." Another breath in and out, and she had regained her composure. She turned to face Roy, and the look in her eyes made it clear that her decision was made. "As long as this tattoo is on my back, I will be living under the burdens my father put upon me. In order for me – Riza Hawkeye – to become independent, it has to be done. Please, I'm begging you to do this for me."

It was Roy's turn to drop his gaze to the ground. He knew he didn't have a choice in the matter, and it pained him deeply that she regretted giving him her father's secrets to the extent that she would go to these lengths to keep it from happening again. He had let her down, and he couldn't change that fact. Hesitantly, he reached into his pocket, pulling out his white gloves. "I now know the perfect methods for incinerating human flesh. I can burn a person beyond recognition and I can char skin in localized areas." As he spoke, his voice held a heavy tone of contempt. "Ironic. This war's made me too accustomed to killing people." He looked back up at Riza, seeing that her eyes were still fixed upon him. "Can this wait until we get back home? Where you can be treated by a doctor?"

"No. It has to be now." Riza said firmly as she rose from her spot on the ground. "I want this over with as soon as possible, while my decision is still made. I don't want to have time to back down. Besides, you know as well as I do that I can't have my back treated by doctors."

While she made valid points, Roy still found himself hesitant. As he ran his thumb over the rigid fabric of his gloves, he said "We'll have to do this somewhere where no one will see."

"Everyone's leaving out of the west side of camp on the trucks. If we find an empty building in the city, we should be fine." Riza informed him.

There was clearly no way Riza was backing down, and Roy didn't really have a say in the matter. Heaving a sigh, he nodded once. "Lead the way."

**A/N: Reviews are appreciated and adored.**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Twelve: No Turning Back**


	12. No Turning Back

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other than the fanfiction itself**

**A/N: Anything about burns and shock I got off of google. Obviously, don't take this story as a reference for medical treatment of burns. Don't follow Riza's example, and take someone to the hospital.**

**This is one of my favorite chapters I've written for this story, and I hope you enjoy it as well.**

**Chapter Twelve: No Turning Back**

Riza's hands closed into fists by her sides as she strode through the abandoned streets of the Ishbalan capitol, her eyes darting to look through windows and open doorframes on either side of the street. She knew that they were far away from the camp that they would remain unseen and unheard, but she was still set on edge by what they were about to do. She knew that this was something she had to do; as long as she had this tattoo upon her back, she would never truly be free. Backing down wasn't an option, and she tried to fight the nauseous feeling rising in her stomach as she looked with dread upon what was about to happen. She had no illusions about her decision: she would be in more pain than she had ever borne in her life, and her recovery would probably be a long one. The cosmetic aspect of the burns didn't worry her; she had never allowed her back to be seen before, so what were a couple scars? She would get through this. It was something she had to do.

Roy's footsteps were silenced by the sand they were treading over, but she was aware of his presence. She could almost feel the anxiety radiating off of him, and it was only feeding her own. In his hands were a roll of bandages and a bottle of painkillers – there was precious little to be found in any of the homes they had searched due to the looting, but they had managed to find the bare minimum. Roy wished that she would listen to him, that, if she insisted upon having him burn her, she would have waited until they were back at home where she could get proper treatment. She had always been a stubborn one, and, usually that didn't bother him. However, at the moment, her determined nature was going to cause her more harm than it usually did her good.

"Here." Riza stated, stopping in front of one of the abandoned houses. From here, camp was scarcely a speck in the distance. Even something as loud as a gunshot wouldn't carry over that distance. Roy turned his head back to look at Riza, planning on giving one last appeal to her rationality, but she had already walked through the front door. Too distraught even to sigh, Roy reluctantly followed her inside, shutting the door behind them.

It was a small miracle that the lights came on when he pulled the cord, and Roy was thankful that he would at least be able to see what he was doing. He narrowed his eyes slightly as he read the direction on the back of the bottle of painkillers, seeing that two pills was the recommended dose. Aware that such guidelines were strictly recommendations, Roy shook four tablets into the palm of his hand, knowing that two wouldn't be nearly enough to suffice for the pain Riza was about to endure. "Take these." He ordered, dropping them into her open palm. He knew she preferred not to take medicine, but she didn't offer up any sort of argument as she popped them into her mouth, swallowing them without any water.

Roy capped the bottle and looked around, seeing what they had to work with. This house, like all the others, had been torn apart in search of anything that could be of value, but the soldiers had left behind anything they thought worthless. Luckily for them, these worthless objects were just what they would need. Roy walked over to the upturned table, flipping it upright once more. Riza would need somewhere to lie while he attempted to treat her burns. "Wait here." Roy told her, using the tone of voice he took on when he was giving orders to subordinates. If Riza was making him do this, they were doing it his way.

He returned moments later with several towels he gathered from one of the bathrooms, and he brought them over to the sink in the kitchen. Upon turning one of the knobs, he found that the pipes leading to the house were still functional. The water wasn't as cold as he would have liked, but he couldn't be picky. This was more than he thought they could have asked for. He placed the plug in the sink, letting it fill with lukewarm water before placing all but one of the towels inside, letting them saturate with water. Another twist of the knob shut off the faucet, and he took the remaining towel in his hands as he walked back over to Riza.

Roy set the towel down on one of the chairs he righted and proceeded to take of his jacket, draping it over a portion of the table. Wordlessly he held out his hand, silently indicating that he wanted Riza to do the same. His fingers closed around the fabric when she passed the garment to him, and he repeated the process with her coat. Most of the table was now covered, hopefully lending to moderate comfort when Riza would need to lie down. Then again, he doubted that comfort would be at the forefront of her mind at that point. After rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, he picked up the towel once more and carried the chair over to Riza, setting it down in front of her.

As Riza pulled her shirt over her head, Roy could have sworn that he saw a flicker of fear pass through her eyes. As soon as it appeared, it was gone, and there was no substantial evidence of it ever having happened at all. Riza handed Roy her shirt and sports bra before sitting down on the chair backwards, her arms resting on the back of the chair and her back facing towards Roy. Roy set her clothing down beside the table and walked back over to her, the towel in his hand.

"Have the pain killers kicked in?"

"I hope so." Riza's voice was flat and factual. When she spoke this way, she was hiding something. Roy had little doubt that she was afraid, and she wanted to get this over with as soon as possible.

Fighting back yet another sigh, Roy handed her the rolled-up piece of cloth. "You're going to want to bite on this."

Riza reached out and took the towel from him, and he could tell that, for a moment, she stopped breathing. He wanted to try one last time to talk her out of her decision, but she had already bitten down on the towel and turned away from him. Her eyes were closed, and her breathing seemed almost forced as she inhaled and exhaled deeply. Letting the words die on his tongue, Roy took a moment to let his hand brush gently over her shoulder, and he voiced the thought that had been repeating itself over and over in his head already. "I'm sorry."

Riza opened her eyes and looked up at him with a mixture of fear and gratitude that mirrored the contrasting emotions she had to have been feeling at the moment. She nodded once before closing her eyes again, letting her chin rest upon the back of the chair.

Roy stepped back from her, placing an adequate distance between them before reaching into his pocket, withdrawing one of his ignition gloves. He felt a catch in the back of his throat as he pulled the glove onto his hand, and he turned to look at Riza, full of disbelief at what he was about to do. The woman sitting in front of him meant more to him than anything else in the world, and he was about to cause her excruciating pain. The fact that she begged him to do it didn't help in the slightest; in reality, it probably made it worse. He didn't have a choice. It was something he had to do because she had asked him to do it. He had told her many times over the years that he would do anything for her, but he never expected her request to be something of this caliber.

Clenching his jaw, Roy lifted his hand, aware that, as soon as he snapped his fingers, there was no turning back. He inhaled deeply, and the seconds seemed to drag by longer than years. He didn't know how long he stood there before he snapped his fingers, and he was violently brought back to reality by the wave of heat that hit his face as fire streamed from his fingertips.

No amount of mental preparation could have prepared Riza for that first burn. The gag in her mouth caught most of her scream, but it was loud enough to bend its way around the cloth and echo off the walls. Her fingers clawed at the frame of the chair, her knuckles turning white as she grasped onto it as if it were life itself. Her back arched against the pain, and she had to fight the temptation to fall into the darkness that began to cloud the edges of her vision. After a moment, her scream died away, and she was left with a silent, quivering wail that resonated inside her chest. Up until this point, she was unaware of the tears streaming down her cheeks. Trying her hardest to breathe, she rested her forehead against the back of the chair.

Roy had turned his face away, incapable of watching as Riza writhed in pain before him. He didn't need to examine her wound to know that he had just burnt away several layers of her flesh, but he hadn't done enough damage to harm the nerves in her back. He didn't want to take away her sense of feeling in her back, but that meant that she would have no relief from the pain she was in at that moment. In the long run, it was the better option, but she was certainly feeling the negative effects of the short term. After her scream had died down, Roy lingered a few more seconds before turning back to her, taking a moment to examine her burn from a distance. The area on her left shoulder blade was a vicious maroon, and he could see that he had burned off one of the crucial parts of the cipher. He had planned in advance where he was going to burn her, and he had gotten the worst over with at the very beginning. That was the largest area he had to singe off.

"Are you ready?" He asked after a few moments, waiting for an answer from Riza. He would wait as long as she needed to recover. A few more seconds passed, and he saw a shaky nod of her head as it rested against the chair.

Once more, Roy snapped his fingers, and Riza let out another scream as the fire targeted a spot on her back just beneath the previous patch that he burned away. With that, the cipher would be completely removed. Without the key, no one would be able to decode what was written on her back. Riza fought with everything she had to keep herself conscious, knowing that fainting wouldn't be advisable in her present situation. To do so was dangerous when she was in this much pain, and she resisted her body's natural impulse to find a way to slip out of the torment. Her head was spinning, and she had no indication of whether or not the painkillers were working to dull the agony.

Her body draped limply over the back of the chair when the initial spasm ceased, and she reached up with her right hand to take the gag from her mouth. She was hiccupping for air, her body trying to continue its natural functions despite the distress it was going through. As she breathed, a faint whimper made its way past her lips each time her back moved. Even the rising and falling of her chest as she tried to breathe caused her pain. She fought back the urge to break down into tears, knowing that doing so would only cause her breathing to become more irregular, thus causing her more pain. It was several minutes before her head cleared enough that she became aware that they were far from finished, and she forced herself to place the gag back into her mouth, clinging to her determination despite her desire to stop. She shifted in her chair, gingerly straightening her back just enough so that Roy could pinpoint his flames.

This time, it was Roy who had to compose himself before continuing. He had little doubt that Riza's muffled screams would haunt his dreams for months to come, and it felt like he was in a living nightmare at that very moment. He decided that this burn would be the last. This time, he would take off the small area just to the right side on the middle of her back, wiping away the spot that first gave them the indication of the change in the cipher. With that gone, the entire code would be completely illegible. For the last time, Roy snapped his fingers, and he turned his head away when he heard Riza scream again.

The darkness was closing in around her eyes, and Riza was beginning to suffer from tunnel vision as she tried desperately to stay conscious. She was in so much agony that she didn't even realize that the cries she was hearing were coming from her own mouth. It felt like hours before the pain finally dulled enough so that it was simply a fierce burning rather than an unbearable torment. Her body was shaking, and she had broken out into a cold sweat despite the heat she had just endured. She had gone pale, and she was on the verge of slipping into shock.

Roy walked over to Riza and noticed the risk immediately, and he knew better than to try to move her at this point. He rushed over to the sink and took one of the damp towels in his hands, carrying it back over to Riza. Rather than placing the cloth directly onto her back, he wrung the water out of the towel onto her skin, cooling the burned area. He could see her relax as the water cooled her burns, and he began to repeat this process with every towel he had soaked in the water, replacing them as soon as he had removed all the moisture from the fabric.

A small amount of color had come back to Riza's face, and she seemed to be breathing more normally than before. Her eyes were squeezed shut, and Roy could tell she was doing her best not to show that she was in pain. Her stubbornness would get the better of her one day – he was sure of it. As gently as he could, Roy lifted her from the chair, taking great care to avoid touching her back. A whimper slipped past Riza's lips, and Roy could tell that she was still teetering on the verge of consciousness. Gingerly, he laid her down upon the table, making sure her head was tilted to the side. Once she was moved, Roy grabbed one of the damp cloths, draping it loosely over her burns.

He would have to change the cloths often in order to keep her skin from sticking to them, and it was best to keep the rags as cool as possible. He would examine her burns more closely after he was certain her condition was stable. If she didn't stabilize, he would need to find her a doctor. Possibilities and worst-case scenarios began to make their way through his mind at a rapid speed, and he became even more certain of the fact that he had just made a terrible mistake. Just as he was about to change the cloth on Riza's back, her eyes fluttered open, and it was easy to see that she was capable of focusing on objects around her rather than just stare blurrily ahead. That was definitely a good sign.

Roy said nothing as he replaced the cloth on her back with a fresh, cool one, and he heard Riza cry faintly, but he couldn't understand what she had said. The whimper came again, and, this time, Roy was able to figure out what it was that she was saying.

"No more…"

Roy reached out and gently brushed her hair back from her face and out of her eyes, assuring her "No more. I swear."

Riza did her best to turn her gaze upwards to Roy, and she was able to see his face out of her peripheral vision. Although she couldn't see it, she felt his hand wrap around hers, squeezing it lightly in a reassuring gesture. He didn't let go, and Riza felt more at peace because of that fact. She squeezed his hand in return, the movement faint in her weekend state. Roy had to listen closely again to hear the next thing she murmured, and he didn't quite know how to react to what she said.

"Thank you…"

A pained look came into Roy's eyes, but it vanished before Riza had a chance to see that expression on his face. Without words to respond to what she said, Roy leaned down, pressing his lips gently against her temple. Despite her pain, he saw Riza's lips turn upwards in the faintest of smiles. Maybe he had made the right decision, after all, he mused as he carefully replaced the cloth on her back once more. It was what she had wanted.

**A/N: Reviews are love.**

**Up Next:**

**Chapter Thirteen: Reporting for Duty**


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